Putting our Husbands First: 3 Easy Ways to Show Him You Love Him

Written by Brandy, Contributing Writer

It’s so easy in our busy, busy lives to lose sight of what’s really important. I’ve been in a place recently where the to-do lists and the demands of each day sometimes take my focus off of my family, in particular, my husband. Don’t get me wrong. I hug and kiss my husband many times throughout the day. I tell him I love him all the time. We talk about our days when he gets home from work. But any man will tell you that’s not enough.

What do our husbands need? They need to know that they are wanted, needed, and desired. They need to be respected and honored simply for who they are, because they are our husbands and the God ordained authority of our homes. Honestly, what I am constantly learning is that my husband needs to know (and be reminded often) that he is the most important person in my life. He needs to know that I will drop everything else at any moment just to listen to or spend time with him.

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I know, I know…it’s not always easy. If you’re anything like me, you have a to-do list waiting for you each morning when you wake up. But I want to give you three things you can do today to make sure your husband knows how much he means to you. Believe me, if you will make time for him and put him first, the peace, rest, and joy in your home will increase exponentially!

1. Kiss him like you mean it

This may seem obvious, but in our day to day lives, sometimes even showing affection can become habitual. It always amazes that if I will simply kiss my hubby on the cheek over and over again, the troubles of his day suddenly seem to melt away. A man may appear strong and callused from the outside, but nothing can melt his heart like sweet kisses from his wife. God designed it that way. We are called to soften them when the world does its best to harden them, to comfort them in a way that only we can. We are to be an expression of the love of God toward them.

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2. Shower him with affirming words

There is so much power in the words that come out of our mouths, power either to build up or tear down. Proverbs 18:21 tells us that “the tongue has the power of life and death”. We can literally impart life to our husbands by using our words for good. “Faith comes by hearing”(Romans 10:17) which means that whatever a person hears all the time is what they will believe. Because of this, it is so important that we affirm our husbands by telling them, out loud, how much they are loved, cherished, adored, honored, and respected. It’s not enough to feel that way about them. It is necessary to tell them!

3. Do something unexpected

I know that I have been guilty of letting myself get in a rut when it comes to my relationship with my husband. We are best friends and we love our life together, but it is so important to do something unexpected every once in a while. Get a sitter for the kids and take him out on a surprise date, plan a romantic night in for after the kids are in bed, or even book a weekend getaway and leave the kids with grandma! Just mix things up a bit! Spontaneity is so refreshing and can bring a spark and an element of fun into your relationship!

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I hope these suggestions will help you to focus on loving your husband in a new way, putting him first, and making sure he knows just how special he is to you. In a society where divorce rates are climbing all the time, and the family as a whole seems to be so out of alignment, simple displays of affection and affirmation go a long way in guarding and protecting your marriage. I’m talking to myself too. Let us undergird and serve, love and honor, and show the world that true biblical womanhood and Godly marriage is not only a possibility, but that it is truly one of the greatest privileges in this life!
How can you love your husband better?

Brandy’s mission is to share the message of health and wellness according the the Word of God and traditional wisdom. She is a homemaker, married to the love of her life since 2004 and a homeschooling mom to 2 amazing boys, ages 5 and 1. 

Join her at Living Water Health and Wellness and connect with her on Facebook or Twitter

About Rachel

Rachel is a mother to four children and a wife to a wellness doctor. Her passions are faith, family, and health. You can find her writing about her family adventures and inspiring you to make healthier choices for your family.


  1. Thanks so much for this post! I really enjoyed it and it made me take a moment to think about my own husband. I thought, when rushing to read this on my phone while at work, that number 2 said something about “showering with husband”! I was relieved to find out it didn’t, because we have older children, and I didn’t know how to fit that in. Then I get to number 3, “Do something unexpected”. I think God may be trying to tell me something!

    • Haha! That’s so funny! 🙂 That might fall into the do something unexpected category like you said. 😉 Even as I wrote, I too, was being challenged to think about ways to show my husband how in love with him I still am. It so important!

  2. These are great suggestions!

  3. That’s some good advice. I just wrote a blog post about writing love notes to our husbands (http://lindsays-logic.blogspot.com/2012/04/art-of-writing-love-notes.html) so finding this post was funny because it is kind of along the same lines. I like to put love notes in my husband’s lunch or email him during the day to remind him that I love him.