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I’m not sure if introverted self explains it, but the comparison trap, am I good enough, I’m too shy, have so much to do at home, whatever the excuse is. Holding back, not taking a risk.
We were busy, starting a business, kids starting preschool, then on into elementary school. Encountering pregnancy loss, waiting, then pregnancy, moving into our first home, birthing a beautiful baby girl, adjusting to her and everything else that goes along with that.
Lincoln, then 3 now 8, working on preschool pages
Early during that busy phase I tried and love MOPS but along the way the meeting day didn’t work out with our homeschool day and work and having a baby and I began to feel myself shift into the homebody, introvert self again.
The deep need we all have for relationship was filled in some ways but other ways is was lacking. I had been feeling a little alone in the motherhood journey. Probably as I had felt the 5 to 6 years ago when I started a moms group in a town I had just moved to with a 10 month old and 2 year old. I remember looking for a group, not finding one, and created one, that surprisingly is still going on in that town.
Five years ago, it wasn’t just about the kids having fun, but the moms too
Kids got older and the need was less, but now with a toddler and another baby the way, I have been feeling the need to connect with other moms growing strong again. The NEED for interaction with other adults, other moms. It’s real. And feeling alone in motherhood (in real life) is hard.
I mean I know a lot of people. Have a great church, a wonderful husband. And know lots of people online and through my blog, but it cannot replace interaction, face to face with other moms when you’re in a season of motherhood with littles.
I finally got brave again, although I almost chickened out and I visited a local moms group. It had been stirring in my heart and I got the nudge I needed to do it. It felt reviving. Like I’m not the only one going through x, y or z. That my input matters. I was running late, and as I walked in, it was my turn to introduce myself, I apologized for being late and one gal said, “Hunny, we’re all late!” It made me feel like I was not alone.
Was I nervous, you bet ya… But opening that introvert shell is helping my need for relationship with other moms. It’ll take time, just as it did when my first two kids were young to build relationships but looking forward to building some new lasting friendships. Having a mom friend to count on, to talk with, to have a shoulder to cry on or to encourage another mom walking through something I have been through.
No, none of this can replace the hole we all have, that only Jesus can fill. We need to be in relationship with Him. But the best part is that He models friendship to us, all over scripture you find Jesus in relationship with the disciples, and then specifically with a couple of them he got ever closer with. They were building friendships.
He wants us in relationships with others… and that includes us moms!
I look forward to this next season of motherhood. Breaking out of my shell and building friendships, in real life, with other moms.
Do you have a need to have “Mommy” friends? Do you ever feel nervous about meeting other moms?
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The post Moms, make time for yourself appeared first on Day2Day Joys.
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Written by Christy @ Fresh Mix Momma, *NEW* Contributing Writer
Okay, fess up..how many moms out there lost themselves after they had kids?
It’s a common thing that happens to many of us (especially stay at home mommies.) We are tried & exhausted from taking care of the house, work and the kids..we certainly don’t have time to do anything for ourselves!
I know..I get it, we’ve all had our “I just want to stay in my yoga pants and not shower” days. but it’s time to stand up and shout:
Moms, make time for yourself!
There are far too many mommies that completely lose themselves after having kids. It’s so easy to get wrapped up in those adorable tiny little tikes. But, what benefit are our little ones getting when they see that we never have time to do anything for ourselves?
I think it’s so very important for kids to see their mommies make time to do something for themselves. and I’m not talking about doing something while they nap. Naptime is a great time to do something but it’s also important for kids to actually see you making time for yourself.
Even if it’s something as simple as actually taking a shower and getting dressed, working out, reading, working on or making time for a hobby.
As much as we love our little ones, they don’t have to consume our lives. It’s okay for them to play with toys by themselves for a little bit while mommy gets stuff done.
Not only will this give them a little independence but this will free up some time for you as well.
Don’t give your kids the impression that they rule your life and that you never do anything just for you.
Making time for yourself is going to help you feel more relaxed and refresh which in turn will make the rest of the house relaxed and refreshed you know it’s true.
So take this as a challenge, permission, validation. whatever you need it to be.
Go do something for yourself!
What are some things you like to do, when you make time for yourself?
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