A Need for Relationship with Other Moms

This may be surprising if you knew me five+ years ago, but over the past 3 to 4 years, since around the time we moved from one to town to another, I have went back to my introverted self.

I’m not sure if introverted self explains it, but the comparison trap, am I good enough, I’m too shy, have so much to do at home, whatever the excuse is. Holding back, not taking a risk. 

We were busy, starting a business, kids starting preschool, then on into elementary school. Encountering pregnancy loss, waiting, then pregnancy, moving into our first home, birthing a beautiful baby girl, adjusting to her and everything else that goes along with that.

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Lincoln, then 3 now 8, working on preschool pages

Early during that busy phase I tried and love MOPS but along the way the meeting day didn’t work out with our homeschool day and work and having a baby and I began to feel myself shift into the homebody, introvert self again.

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The deep need we all have for relationship was filled in some ways but other ways is was lacking. I had been feeling a little alone in the motherhood journey. Probably as I had felt the 5 to 6 years ago when I started a moms group in a town I had just moved to with a 10 month old and 2 year old. I remember looking for a group, not finding one, and created one, that surprisingly is still going on in that town. 

Five years ago, it wasn’t just about the kids having fun, but the moms too

Kids got older and the need was less, but now with a toddler and another baby the way, I have been feeling the need to connect with other moms growing strong again. The NEED for interaction with other adults, other moms. It’s real. And feeling alone in motherhood (in real life) is hard.

I mean I know a lot of people. Have a great church, a wonderful husband. And know lots of people online and through my blog, but it cannot replace interaction, face to face with other moms when you’re in a season of motherhood with littles.

I finally got brave again, although I almost chickened out and I visited a local moms group. It had been stirring in my heart and I got the nudge I needed to do it. It felt reviving. Like I’m not the only one going through x, y or z. That my input matters. I was running late, and as I walked in, it was my turn to introduce myself, I apologized for being late and one gal said, “Hunny, we’re all late!”  It made me feel like I was not alone.

Was I nervous, you bet ya… But opening that introvert shell is helping my need for relationship with other moms. It’ll take time, just as it did when my first two kids were young to build relationships but looking forward to building some new lasting friendships. Having a mom friend to count on, to talk with, to have a shoulder to cry on or to encourage another mom walking through something I have been through.

No, none of this can replace the hole we all have, that only Jesus can fill. We need to be in relationship with Him. But the best part is that He models friendship to us, all over scripture you find Jesus in relationship with the disciples, and then specifically with a couple of them he got ever closer with. They were building friendships. 

He wants us in relationships with others… and that includes us moms!

I look forward to this next season of motherhood. Breaking out of my shell and building friendships, in real life, with other moms. 

Do you have a need to have “Mommy” friends? Do you ever feel nervous about meeting other moms? 

 

About Rachel

Rachel is a mother to four children and a wife to a wellness doctor. Her passions are faith, family, and health. You can find her writing about her family adventures and inspiring you to make healthier choices for your family.

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