You may or may not know but I had a misacarriage at the beginning of the year. I have actually had a very hard time healing emotionally as we thought we were done having kids. Then surprise pregnant, fell in love, then had a missed miscarriage (when your body doesn’t realize your baby has died.) And I am still working my way through the healing process. (I shared my story here). 

Going through all of that, things weren’t really my favorite… and it was definitely finding the joy in our day to day lives but I know that God is a good God and HE has GOOD plans, no matter what! 

With all that said, I am glad to be sharing some of my favorites for this month! You can check out a whole video where I go into detail about each of the 5 items here OR below! 

A Few of my Favorite things…

April Edition

1. Square felt letter board and letter board from Hobby Lobby 
2. Redmond Clay facial mud mask 
3. Acure dry shampoo
4. Altar’d State ones I have or Birkenstock style sandals (pretty much the same, different brand over on amazon) 
5. DIY all-purpose cleaner: mix vinegar, a little water, dish soap, tea tree oil and essential oils of your choice 

What are a few of your favorite things? Have you (or do you) use/d any of these same things?

The post A Few of my Favorite Things {April} appeared first on Day2Day Joys.

Related posts:

A Few of my Favorite Things {April Edition} A Few of my Favorite Things {August Edition}

Are you a crafty gal? I love crafts but I don’t make time for them. 

Sometimes when I want to do something I combine it with a Moms Night Out! So that’s what I did a couple months ago. 

I scoured pinterest for a fun activity, took a vote of several options and the string art/felt flower craft one won!! Much to my surprise it was actually a lot easier that I thought. 

This would be a perfect Mother’s Day gift!! 

I shared exactly how I went about making this over on my youtube channel in this video.. hope you’ll take a look and if you make one, I’d love to see it! Tag me over on Instagram! 

Have you ever made a string art craft or felt flowers? 

The post DIY Mason Jar String Art + Felt Flowers (5 varieties) Tutorial appeared first on Day2Day Joys.

Most of us will go through some pretty tough times at some point in our lives. Before I shared my story, I didn’t realize the power and healing it would have.

Your story, my story is a gift from God to draw others to Jesus.

God is writing a GREAT masterpiece.. He is writing the stories of our lives! And we are all currently walking through different chapters and different seasons.

In Paul Tripp’s book, New Morning Mercies, he says…

“Every turn He writes into your story is RIGHT.

Every twist in the plot is for the BEST.

Every new chapter or unexpected event is a tool of His GRACE. 

Each new chapter advances His PURPOSES.”

He is writing a story in my own life…here’s a quick synopsis:

The chapters start all the way in Arizonato end up in TN. From growing up, finding Jesus to my first job at @crackerbarrel . Then going to college at @leeuniversity to marrying Jake, moving to SC where we both finished our degrees, him at @shermancollege and I went to the university SC-upstate… where we had a couple babies. After graduating moving to TN where we found @foothillschurchtn & are still part of it after 8+ years. After waiting and trusting God, we opened @victoryhealthcenter !! Experienced loss but all along the way knowing the Lord had a plan. Later had a couple more babies all while starting homeschooling. And even still after 13 years of marriage, I still am in as much love as I was with Jake as when I first met him at that @leeuflames basketball game. And in this current chapter of heartbreaking loss of another miscarriage, I find comfort knowing the God has a a plan and it is GOOD!
If you’re current chapter is hard, find comfort in knowing you’re not alone and that the Lord is with you. (I’m having to constantly remind myself as I walk this chapter out)

Here’s a link to my DRAW MY LIFE Story! 

#drawmylife #mystory

The post Draw my Life || The Story God is Writing in ME appeared first on Day2Day Joys.

Related posts:

Loving Your Husband With A Newborn At Home Seeing the Death of Jesus Through the Loss of a Child Dealing with Discouragement

I had a miscarriage.

Or maybe I should say, I am having a miscarriage.

Something I definitely thought I’d never say again. 

We thought we were done having kids. I was content. He was content. Our little family with 4 beautiful children.

Going through ups and downs as parents, failures, successes to thinking we’ve got it a little figured out to downright low again. And then do it all over again.

But we were content. Then one day, I felt off and my period was late, and I knew. So I grabbed a pregnancy text and waited, and yep, I was pregnant.

Suddenly, ALL the excitement and fear was all tangled up together at the same time.

From the moment I saw the positive test, my heart grew in love. I began thinking, planning, preparing. I had a feeling it was a girl. Later that week, I told my husband.

And even purchased an ornament about our surprise baby to give him. 

I began having pregnancy symptoms over the next couple of weeks. Morning sickness and all. I thought this is going to be ok.

We’re going to have another baby! Baby #5! I was over the moon excited. 

At 6 weeks, I went into an appointment to check on the baby. I saw a baby, heartbeating and all! Two weeks later, I went into my 8 appointment. My pregnancy symptoms had been wacky, there and then not, but I was hoping it was just different with baby #5. The appointment we’d check on the baby and be released into the care of my midwife. 

So I laid on the table with the ultrasound tech. Sweet as can be lady. And right away I knew. I knew our baby was gone.

There was no baby, just an empty sac. So this is where I am now, grieving, trying to understand and waiting for a physical miscarriage to take place. 

I know God has a plan, and a purpose but that doesn’t mean it’s easy walking though it.

Here are 2 verses that give me a little peace about this: 

James 1:2-3

Psalm 46:1

I don’t know God’s plan or why this happened, I just have to trust Him! One day I WILL be able to look back on this and see the amazing plan God had all along. His ways are not our ways! And HIS plans are always GOOD! 

Thank you for all your thoughts and prayers during this time! 

I share more about this in a youtube video I shared here. 

-Rachel

(images via google)

The post I am having a miscarriage. appeared first on Day2Day Joys.

Related posts:

The Birth Story of Baby #4 {Part One} Preparing for a Homebirth {My Supply List} The Birth Story of London Everleigh {Part Two}

To begin this story I guess I’ll have to take you back to the Spring of 2015. (if you want to skip all of the pre-story, scroll down to where it says Coby’s Birth Story) 

We were busy with life, work, kids’ school, a 1 year old running around and our “husband and wife” time had been lacking. So I was trying to be more intentional to make time for that!  

We weren’t sure about having any more kids but I certainly had caught the baby bug. I just count imagine that we were “done.”

Well, on the eve of my 33rd birthday after dealing with on and off spotting for a few days and Aunt Flow being late, I took a test. I had had negative tests before so I waited in anticipation for those 2 long minutes, since I really wanted to be pregnant… PREGNANT… the digital test flashed.

My heart pounded and I was flooded with all kinds of emotions; fear of loss, excitement of another baby, dreadfulness of morning sickness and wonder. My husband had went out of town that afternoon for a seminar and I wondered what he would think. Would it be excitement, would it be joy, would it be fear? 

I texted him a picture of London holding the pregnancy test. No answer. So I called him. No answer. He texted me he was in the airport eating dinner. Later we chatted and he was in disbelief, he thought I was joking or pranking him. He even thought that for a few days or even a week or so until I told him I scheduled an appoint with the OB to make sure it wasn’t an ectopic pregnancy since I have had one before. 

I slightly remember his face, like a… you weren’t kidding face. 

We went to that appointment and the little baby showed up on the ultrasound, too early to detect a heartbeat but there. Another miracle baby. 

If you’ve ever experienced a pregnancy loss, you know that just because you see the baby on the screen, that Satan sneaks in any second he can to cloud your joy with fear. I had to constantly defeat that fear with London’s pregnancy and seems as if I was doing the same thing with this pregnancy. 

The doctor scheduled me for a follow up a couple weeks later before I was dismissed to the care of my midwife. Although we would rather avoid ultrasounds, another one was done to confirm the baby’s growth and heartbeat. 

The morning sickness had already settled in by that point. It was all I could do to finish up those last few weeks of toting my kids to co-op and work on school on home days. But thank goodness it was (mostly) summer time during all of that. Most of the summer was spent on the couch, sleeping the sickness off and praying the kids were safe. A lot more TV was on and somehow the 1 year old survived too. Good thing she has an awesome big brother and sister. 

Although it seemed like forever in the moment, the summer passed and before long, I was feeling better. 

We took a wonderful, much needed, trip to the beach and then the Fall semester flew by and BEFORE LONG, it was Christmas break. And this is where the true beginning of baby #4’s birth story begins.

Coby’s Birth Story:

Christmas had came and went and my hope for an early baby (meaning earlier than 40 weeks pregnant) was gone. Little did I know that just 10 days later, 1 day shy of my due date, I would deliver a healthy baby. 

My parents and sister and her family had been visiting. My sister and her family left on New Year’s Eve to head back home while the rest of us just hung out. I was really worn out by this time and didn’t feel like doing much of anything. All the holidays during that busy season, all while my belly was growing and caring for our other 3 children, took a toll on me. 

The Saturday before Coby was born I had felt a little off and was hoping that just maybe it would be the day. My husband and I went to a wedding that night but nothing happened. (before we left for the wedding selfie above) The next day was Sunday, we streamed church on TV and there were no signs of a baby coming. I thought, I guess the baby will be coming late like all the others. 

I was so ready, I even shared this picture on instagram after taking a nice bath. 

I went to bed that night around 11:30pm which was pretty early (for me)since I had been going to bed around 12:30-1am. 

I woke up at a 10am… YES, I got to sleep! I may have woke up a little before but just laid in bed checking email and fb scrolling. When I got out of bed I definitely felt off, but just like the days before it turned out to be nothing. So I put clothes on, brushed my teeth, started a load of laundry, made my bed and sat on the rocking chair my mom had just re-covered days before. I felt contractions but wasn’t sure if they were intense baron hicks or what. 

I went downstairs where everyone was. It’s nice to have Mamaw in town to get up with the kids, especially London!! I mentioned to my mom that I was feeling off and was going to eat some cereal. Which by the way, I never eat cereal but I guess my body knew I would need some carbs.  

Mom asked about going to Costco since we were going to go Sunday but didn’t end up going. So I ate by cereal, continued to feel contractions once in a while, and told my mom if we were going we needed to go “now.” 

I figured that if these were real contractions they wouldn’t go away, even if we went to the store. I didn’t even wear a jacket as we walked to the car even though it was lightly, sprinkling snow. We went into Costco and got the items we needed. A couple different times I actually had to lean against the cart when I had contractions. I knew this was it just not sure when it was all going to happen. We walked to the car and I walked straight to the passenger seat while mom loaded the van. I texted Jake and my midwife around 11am. 

We got home, mom unloaded car while I went upstairs to lay down on the bed. A while after mom came up to check on me and ask if I wanted a snack. She got me one and I ate only a couple bite. The contractions were consistent but not getting any closer. 

I was beginning to doubt myself, that I really could handle this pain. I was having unrealistic thoughts like what if this lasts all day and night. And I couldn’t bear the thought if that. 

Jake called and said he would be home later and was taking the 2nd shift off from work. Sometime a while later he came home. All I had been doing was laying there and noting my contractions. I voiced my doubtfulness to him. Not sure what he said but probably something along the lines of whatever, you can do it. Then he went back downstairs. 

I *think* I like laboring by myself and no one else in the room. (Not the actual time when it’s getting close but the time before). I finally texted him around 2:30 along with the midwife. Again, for this birth, just like with London’s 22 month earlier, we had decided we did not want the kids to be home during the birth. And my Dad actually was scared of the idea of being home, even if he wasn’t in the room. I am not sure what he thought might be going on but he was hoping to already be back home in Arizona by the time the baby came. Obviously that didn’t happen.

Here are the text conversations from that day:

Blue and gray is my husband and I, green and gray is my midwife Lisa and I. 

Mom and kids all came and said goodbye and left, Jake began to get things prepped. I decided to go to the bathroom and was in such a painful state when I wiped I said “there’s blood” with an gasping voice. Then I got on all fours and waited for him to get the pool ready. 

I walked to the pool and sat down and said this is helping. I had watched home birth videos and in almost all of them, the mother looks so peaceful so that’s what I was imagining for myself. 

Unfortunately I was not feeling like what I saw on the videos. That relaxing, “this is helping” quickly faded and there was no relief, lying on my back just wasn’t doing it for me, even on the pool, so I had to get on my knees and lean forward. 

At this point I was still thinking this is never going to end!! 

Part two… coming soon! 

The post The Birth Story of Baby #4 {Part One} appeared first on Day2Day Joys.

Related posts:

The Most Precious Valentine’s Day Gift {A Natural Birth Story} The Birth Story of London Everleigh {Part Two} Top Questions to Ask Your Midwife or OB

Written by Courtney @ A + Life (originally published in April of 2015)

My Natural Birth Plans

I don’t have plans to take these to the hospital with me. I’m not going to be the girl who shows up with a bullet point, high lighted, step by step birth plan….. mostly because my plans are “hands off, please”. But, that’s easy enough to say, and not necessary to be printed out on a piece of paper.

I remember when I got pregnant with my first daughter, Abigail. Even though it had taken us a year to get pregnant with her, I was still fairly blissfully naive when it came to all things baby. First time parent, ah quite youthful, and just a bit uninformed. It was well into my 6th month or so, I was almost in third tri, when I was in Virginia to be a bridesmaid for one of my very best friends. We all got to talking about labor and delivery, and up to that point, I had planned to do whatever my Dr. told me and OBVIOUSLY get the epidural. Mostly, because I just hadn’t given it much thought. But the more we talked, and more and more of the women shared their stories about home birth, zero interventions, refusing induction and epidurals, the more I got to thinking….perhaps I should do some research myself?

Keep in mind that this was 2010, so it was basically the technological dark ages.

I got my hands on a copy of Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth and it completely revolutionized the way I thought about childbirth. From that point on, I knew that I was going to have a intervention free delivery and made all of my plans based off of that choice.

And if the years of praying and waiting for our second gift, Mabel, and the years of being a mama and taking care of a little one have done anything for me, it has been this: the pendulum of “crunch factor” has way swung and I only continue to up the ante on myself as I have choices.

The first time I read Ina May I totally, totally got her points. They made absolute sense to me, but I was like, DANG these people are weird as all get out. But rereading it this time around? I’m like, how can I get to “The Farm”(her “commune” for those of you who aren’t familiar with her) and live in a cabin and give birth there. Like, today. So, as I’ve said, it’s fairly obvious to see that I’ve continued down the all natural road and have no plans of putting the brakes on it anytime soon.

So, here is what I am already doing:

(This is all from consultations and advice from my naturopath)

• Prenatal + Iron
• Vitamin B Supplement
• Vitamin D Supplement
• Probiotic
• Tons of water
• Sitting on the birthing ball for a few minutes every evening
• Rereading my birthing books(bonus if it’s while I’m on the birthing ball!)
• Drinking Red Raspberry Leaf Tea
• And I’m starting to select birth affirmations and bible verses to start meditating on to prepare my heart and mind for labor and delivery.

The Plans For Me: 

• Refusal of all pre-labor cervical checks
• Refuse any and all induction- obviously, to a reasonable extent. My first daughter, Abigail came on her due date, so I have no reason to think that this should be an issue. But, I’m perfectly ready to go up to 42 weeks if Mabel needs it.
• Once labor begins, labor at home for as long as possible. On the birthing ball, in the tub, eating and drinking, staying calm and composed.
• Once labor progresses to the point where we think it is wise to head to the hospital, then we will head that way.
• Once at the hospital, no IV(will concede to a heplock), no constant fetal monitoring(if possible), and laboring how it feels best.
• And that is basically it! I ended up wanting to push while reclining, that felt the most comfortable to me and my water didn’t break until completion so those were two non-issues last time that I hope will be the same again.

I mostly just want to be left to labor with Jim, my Mom, and my good friend who is a doula.

For Mabel: 

To me, this is the section with the biggest changes from my previous delivery. I didn’t do a ton of research as far as what baby goes through and what the standard procedures are in the hospital after baby is born with Abigail. Obviously, it all turned out just fine, but there are certainly things I want to do differently this time around.

After Mabel is delivered, if all is well:

• I want her to be immediately placed on my chest for skin to skin and nursing.
• Delayed cord clamping
• Delayed bath
• Refusal of eye ointment
• Delaying the Hep B shot until a later pediatrician appointment
• Requesting that any and all checks, vitamin K shot, or other things be delayed until after the first nursing session or while she is on my chest.
• If possible, not use pitocin to expel the placenta and let it deliver when it is ready.
• And of course, keeping Mabel in the room with us at all times. Jim can go with her if they need to take her anywhere.

I’ve had a few different talks with my OB about my plans and she has been nothing but sweet and understanding about my ideas. Thankfully, I am a 100% low risk, textbook patient, so there isn’t any reason to worry much about how things will go. She also delivered Abigail and is aware of my previous labor and delivery, which I think helps keep our communication open. The hospital where I had Abigail has since closed it’s birthing center, but a brand new hospital just opened in March, so I should be using all new state of the art equipment and have been told that their birthing rooms are very similar to my previous experience(labor, deliver, recover all in the same room + room in with baby).

As my OB and I talked through my “plans” she just suggested that anything I say to the nurses about my desires to preface it with “Dr. B and I have already discussed this and she is aware of my wishes” or if she is present, just have Jim or my doula remind her of my plans(such as delayed cord clamping) so that we can achieve a great birth together.

So, at this point, in these last few weeks of waiting, I’m really just trying to prepare my heart and mind for what is coming. With Abigail, I was fiercely determined. And not so much nervous. This time, I feel anxious and scared because I can remember it hurting so badly. But, I know that it is what is best for me and for Mabel and I’m happy to choose it and do it the same way as I did with Abigail. I just need to get my head in the game before hand!

One verse that has particularly stood out to me that I have been memorizing in preparation for her delivery is a verse that showed up during this semester’s ladies bible study(we’re studying 1st and 2nd Thessalonians):

“We give thanks to God always for you all, constantly mentioning you in our prayers, remembering before our God and Father your work of faith and labor of love and steadfastness of hope in our Lord Jesus Christ. For we know, brethren beloved by God, that He has chosen you.” 1 Thessalonians 1: 2-4

Did you have a birth plan? What did it look like? 

The post Natural Labor And Delivery Plans appeared first on Day2Day Joys.

Related posts:

The Birth Story of London Everleigh {Part Two} 10 Tips for a Healthy Pregnancy The Birth Story of London Everleigh {Part Three}

Written by Lydia @ Frugal Debt Free Life, Contributing Writer

Do you ever feel like you’re long on to do and short on time? I have spent so many months, years even, feeling that way. It wasn’t until recently that I came to fully understand the amount of control I actually did have over my time and how I spent it.

In fact, it seems like that is one of the things that I do have near-complete control over. Sure, I have small children and a husband, a business, and obligations. There is a mortgage and tummies that need to be fed, diapers that need to be changed. I get all of that.

But here is the thing, how much time do I spend perusing Facebook during an afternoon lull? How many times have I let a phone call yammer on when I could have been more precise and to the point? And how many hours have I wasted binge watching Netflix?

I don’t even want to consider tallying the hours. Of course, there is nothing wrong with doing any of those things. But I can’t very well call myself “busy” if that is how I choose to spend my precious time. Because time is just that… precious.

We can’t earn more of it, once it’s gone, it’s gone. So I have had to learn how to command the most out of my days. It hasn’t always been easy, but it’s been worth it.

How to be less busy:

1. 1. Determine what matters

It’s really important to determine what fulfills you and then plan your days around that. What are your priorities? It is important to figure out what your true priorities are. These are the places we seem willing to invest the most of our time and energy. If you took a good luck at how I spent my time you might see that housework was low on my list, and watching YouTube videos of people putting on makeup was high on my list.

But that’s not an accurate representation of what matters to me, so I’ve had to adjust my time accordingly. Of course, I just figured out I could stream YouTube through my television, so I just watch those videos while I clean.

Things that do matter are family time. I often say not to weekend events because I want us to spend time together as a family while my husband is home. It means less social time but more family time.

2. What provides value

Recently I had gotten sucked into a group chat on Facebook. A community function that I am a part of was using the group chat as a way to send out information. The problem was the information was getting lost in responses, thumbs up and emojis of cats eating pizza. It was both a distraction and a waste of time. And above all, it wasn’t providing a value to the group. Everyone had to sort through the responses to get to the meat of the information and there were several miscommunications as a result.

I left the group chat and suggested instead the information just be sent in a quick bullet point email. I realize that may sound abrupt on my part, but when you’re juggling a home, small children, and a business sometimes you have to be direct.

I also left several Facebook group pages that were taking up way more time than necessary and turned I down a few work opportunities because they just didn’t provide good value for my time.

3. Prioritize your to do

When I make a to-do list I like to jot down the things on my list in order of importance. I take care of the important items first. That way they are out of the way and not hanging over my head. I can better focus my time, energy and attention this way.

4. Don’t check your email.

I know this sounds counter-productive. But unless you are waiting on a very specific and important email just don’t check it until you’ve made it through your to-do list.

It’s so easy to get distracted if you jump on Gmail really quickly or your hop on Google News to scan the headlines. You can so easily get sucked into the rabbit hole that is the internet that you don’t get things done that you set out to accomplish.

5. Remove one thing

Okay, pull out your planner or your calendar app and look at your upcoming appointments? What is not necessary? What is not providing value to you? What do you dread doing? 

Don’t do it. Just cancel your appointment and say no. If it’s not vital to your survival or to your family don’t do it. 
I feel like in today’s society we value being busy. We glorify it and wear it like a badge of honor. And we misuse the word. I know that for me I am often not busy, I am just distracted and it’s important for me to refocus my time and energy.

The post How to be less busy appeared first on Day2Day Joys.

Related posts:

Create Your Own Health Arsenal: Build A Strong Immune System & Treat Symptoms Naturally A Day in the Life of…. A Busy Mom Toddler Quiet Time: a daily routine to give everyone breathing time

image via pixabay

Written by Lydia @ Frugal Debt Free Life, Contributing Writer

I don’t think she meant anything by it. This woman standing in front of me at the preschool Halloween party.

“Do you work or are you just a mom?”

I know she didn’t mean anything by it. It was a more a reflection she saw of herself than of me. See, she had labeled herself as “just a mom.”

She told me she quit her job after her daughter was born.

“I don’t regret is for a minute, but I miss the creativity,” she said.

And I nodded along.

The whole drive home I thought about it. I thought how sad it was that she labeled herself “just a” anything.

But don’t we all do that? I’m just a mom. I’m just a teacher. I’m just a … fill in the blank.

But we are more than just one thing. Caretakers, cooks, teachers, people tasked with the nurturing of little people. And oh, what a wonderful, exhausting, beautiful and messy task it can be. It’s important work, ladies. Don’t label yourself as “just a” anything.

But I thought about the other half of her statement too, “I miss the creativity.”

I felt that very deeply.

I have always leaned toward the creative. Before I became a stay at home mom I was a news reporter. I loved writing. I loved meeting people and telling their stories. And to be totally honest when my oldest son was a baby, I missed it.

I craved for a creative outlet to express myself.

So what is a creative type to do when she feels like “just a mom?” How does a mother nurture her own creativity?

1. Carry a journal.

I like to carry a simple notebook with me. If you ever see me out in public, it’s in my purse. I carry it to church, to the supermarket, the park. Everywhere.

I jot down ideas, make to do lists, create goals and just dump out everything on to paper before it leaves my brain.

2. Connect with other creatives

One Sunday morning I had the privilege of working in our church nursery with a fellow stay at home mom who had been an art teacher.

We discussed messy houses, painting, writing, sewing and blogging. It was so nice to talk to someone who was just as scattered and messy as me.

3. Take the time to do what you love

If you love to write then write. If you’re a painter, pull out your brushes and paint. Don’t say you don’t have time. If you have time to cruise Facebook, then you have time to focus 15 minutes on something that speaks to your soul.

4. Find things that spark your creativity

Go for walks, take a drive down a back road, people watch in the pickup line at preschool. Whatever it is that gives you a germ of an idea and sparks inspiration, go to those places.

Make your creativity a priority in your own life.

How have you sparked creativity and became “more than just a Mom”??

The post You’re more than “just a mom” + four ways to spark creativity appeared first on Day2Day Joys.

Related posts:

Growing into a Purposeful Mom Going from being a Stay at Home Mom to a Working Mom {My Motherhood Story} A Day in the Life of…a Healthy Mom

Written by Karen @To Work With My Hands, Contributing Writer

It was one of those Friday afternoons.

School should have been finished early on that day. We worked hard all week to plan it that way – and that would have pleased me.

But, one distraction after another, and there we were, wrapping things up at nearly 4:00. Those days happen.

The swirling list of what I had hoped to accomplish during that “extra” afternoon was crashing hard against the clock and the approaching dinner hour. Clearly, my plans were not going to happen.

Just one more thing, and we’d head out the door to get at least a few of them done. 

Then there was yet another interruption. I chose to ignore my growing frustration, but it was slowly winning.

“Can you just let me finish up, okay?”

Translation: “Please don’t keep talking to me right now. Doesn’t it make sense to you that if you will give me peace for a few minutes I can get finished much quicker and that trip to the store to buy that toy that you’ve waited for all week long and have your money all gathered together for would happen sooner?”

That’s really what my curt question asked. And, she knew it. This is the ugly truth.

I looked up into the eyes thinking perhaps this wouldn’t take too long to listen to, and then I could get back to what I was trying to finish so we could go, so we could get back, so I could cook dinner…

There was anticipation in the eyes – eyes full of hope and inspiration. What was this about?

We had spent some time in our early afternoon planning which co-op classes they would each like to take this fall, and one in particular had strummed a chord in our daughter’s heart.

“Do you know what the first thing is that I’m going to learn when I go to sign language class?”

“What’s that?”

“God loves you.”

Her eyes danced with tender joy. Mine dropped with shame.

Yeah, I had pretty much blown it.

That “one more thing” to do had triumphed for the time that I should have invested fully into my daughter instead. I had made the wrong choice.

Ouch!

So, what do you do when you fairly blow it with your children? 

Apologize and ask forgiveness.

Humbling ourselves before our children when we have wronged them doesn’t make them respect us less – it encourages them to respect us more. 

When they see that their parents are real people, just as capable of sin and in just as much need of grace as they are, it increases their respect and fosters the truth that we all, regardless of our position in life, need Jesus to sanctify our hearts. 

Seek to restore or re-do if possible. 

Thankfully, in my situation, I was then able to listen fully to what my daughter had to say and to encourage her that the attitude she was trying to share with me was very good.

Sometimes, however, the moment is lost and you simply can’t go back: you missed that butterfly that has now flown away, you realize that in your haste to get the next thing done, you punished the wrong child for an offense, you missed the deadline for something your child had asked to do.

In these situations you’ll have to use them as opportunities to learn a lesson yourself.

Perhaps you could remember that butterfly the next time your toddler repeatedly pats your leg while you are busy. 

Maybe you’ll purpose to take more time to get the the bottom of a matter and determine who is really at fault, rather than just trying to take care of things and move on to the next thing.

Or, perhaps you could write down the request and make yourself a deadline, setting a reminder on your phone so that you can give them an answer in plenty of time.

Pray for forgiveness, guidance, and strength.

We’re children too, after all, and are in constant need of grace form our Heavenly Father. He knows our every weakness, our flaws, our missteps, yet loves us unconditionally and desires for us to be in fellowship with Him and in a right relationship with those around us. 

When we run to Him with our failures and needs, He is faithful to forgive us, to cleanse us, and to work in our hearts the fruit of His Spirit, making us more like Christ.

Blowing it with your children is not pleasant, but it does happen to all of us. When we fail, if we have hearts that seek to be humble before God and before our children, we can enjoy restoration and the return of joy in our relationship.

Do you have other tips for making things right when we blow it with our children?

The post What To Do When You Pretty Much Blow It With Your Children appeared first on Day2Day Joys.

Related posts:

Going from being a Stay at Home Mom to a Working Mom {My Motherhood Story} You ARE Enough Toddler Quiet Time: a daily routine to give everyone breathing time

I’m not sure if introverted self explains it, but the comparison trap, am I good enough, I’m too shy, have so much to do at home, whatever the excuse is. Holding back, not taking a risk. 

We were busy, starting a business, kids starting preschool, then on into elementary school. Encountering pregnancy loss, waiting, then pregnancy, moving into our first home, birthing a beautiful baby girl, adjusting to her and everything else that goes along with that.

Lincoln, then 3 now 8, working on preschool pages

Early during that busy phase I tried and love MOPS but along the way the meeting day didn’t work out with our homeschool day and work and having a baby and I began to feel myself shift into the homebody, introvert self again.

The deep need we all have for relationship was filled in some ways but other ways is was lacking. I had been feeling a little alone in the motherhood journey. Probably as I had felt the 5 to 6 years ago when I started a moms group in a town I had just moved to with a 10 month old and 2 year old. I remember looking for a group, not finding one, and created one, that surprisingly is still going on in that town. 

Five years ago, it wasn’t just about the kids having fun, but the moms too

Kids got older and the need was less, but now with a toddler and another baby the way, I have been feeling the need to connect with other moms growing strong again. The NEED for interaction with other adults, other moms. It’s real. And feeling alone in motherhood (in real life) is hard.

I mean I know a lot of people. Have a great church, a wonderful husband. And know lots of people online and through my blog, but it cannot replace interaction, face to face with other moms when you’re in a season of motherhood with littles.

I finally got brave again, although I almost chickened out and I visited a local moms group. It had been stirring in my heart and I got the nudge I needed to do it. It felt reviving. Like I’m not the only one going through x, y or z. That my input matters. I was running late, and as I walked in, it was my turn to introduce myself, I apologized for being late and one gal said, “Hunny, we’re all late!”  It made me feel like I was not alone.

Was I nervous, you bet ya… But opening that introvert shell is helping my need for relationship with other moms. It’ll take time, just as it did when my first two kids were young to build relationships but looking forward to building some new lasting friendships. Having a mom friend to count on, to talk with, to have a shoulder to cry on or to encourage another mom walking through something I have been through.

No, none of this can replace the hole we all have, that only Jesus can fill. We need to be in relationship with Him. But the best part is that He models friendship to us, all over scripture you find Jesus in relationship with the disciples, and then specifically with a couple of them he got ever closer with. They were building friendships. 

He wants us in relationships with others… and that includes us moms!

I look forward to this next season of motherhood. Breaking out of my shell and building friendships, in real life, with other moms. 

Do you have a need to have “Mommy” friends? Do you ever feel nervous about meeting other moms? 

The post A Need for Relationship with Other Moms appeared first on Day2Day Joys.

Related posts:

You ARE Enough On Being Organized Moms, make time for yourself